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Nancy Holte

Encouraging women to grab hold of God's plan for their lives

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I Refuse

September 12, 2011

In a few short hours we will board a plane bound for Moldova. Well, actually, we’ll board a plane, and then another plane, and THEN the plane to Moldova but eventually we’ll end up there. Where in the world is Moldova anyway? I will have to say that with our recent surge in traveling my geography skills have reached new heights and may now be at least at a fifth grade level. Moldova is located east of Romania and is surrounded on the other three sides by the Ukraine. I’m sure it’s perfectly clear for you now. We’ll be in Moldova for just a couple of days and then we head to Zurich, Switzerland for five days. As you might guess, this is a mission trip, or as we call them at our church, a Global Project. I wonder if anyone really goes to Moldova just for fun?

I love going on Global Project trips but if I were to be totally honest I’d have to say that most often, before I leave, I am scared to death. Do I fear harm of some sort? Not at all. Here’s what I am afraid of; the food and the accommodations. I know it sounds silly but it’s the truth. I’m not a huge fan of foreign foods. There are even a few, quite a few really, American foods that I don’t like all that much. Basically, I’m a fussy eater. Add to that a couple of food allergies and eating can sometimes be a challenge. As long as I don’t need to worry about offending anyone I’m o.k., it’s just that sometimes we are fed by a host family/missionary/orphanage cooks and you really don’t want to offend them. So, I try. I’ve already started praying that I won’t be faced with anything that’ll make me gag. Ha! (I also have a suitcase full of high energy foods to “tide me over” until our return.)

As for the accommodations, well, let’s just say you never now what you might end up with but you can be fairly certain that it’ll never be The Hilton. But, I’ve managed to live with some pretty nasty places and as long as I have my own travel pillow along, I usually do o.k. This time will be a little bit more interesting in that we’ll be staying at someone’s home in Moldova. I’m trying to think of it as a short-term Rotary Exchange program.

Why then, do I go, you might be wondering? Because I feel that God has asked me to do this for Him. When I consider all He’s done for me, it would be foolish really to say no. And, as a missionary friend once told me, “If God asks you to do something and it makes you fearful, do it afraid.”

There is a song that I’ve been hearing a lot on the radio lately. It pretty much sums up my feelings about this trip. It’s called, I Refuse by Josh Wilson. Click on the song title if you’d like to hear it in full. It’s an amazing song! Below is the chorus.

‘Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care.
I don’t want to say another empty prayer.
Oh, I refuse to
Sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself.
Oh, I could choose
Not to move but I refuse.

So, that’s why I go. Because I refuse to say no to God. Would He find someone else for the job it I didn’t go? Of course. But then I would miss out on the adventure and the blessing.

I was encouraged this morning by a verse I read in my morning devotions. In Psalm 139:5 David says to the Lord, “You both precede and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.” Even though I may be fearful, I can rest in the knowledge that God has his hand of blessing on my head. Why then, should I be afraid?

I know I’ll have more to share as the week progresses so check back. I’m not entirely sure of my accessibility to the internet; that’s part of the adventure. I’ll post when I can. And, when I come to mind, I wouldn’t be at all offended if you offered up a prayer for our team and the people to whom we’ll me ministering.

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  1. i am a redhead says

    September 22, 2011 at 11:23 am

    Love love love this, Nancy! Do it afraid is exactly right!!! I hope you are surprised by Moldova and that you love your time there, I know I did! And the food is not at all scary…it's very good (although you'll have to let me know what you think of it!)

    I am praying for you guys…sooo excited for you! :-)

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